Wednesday, January 26, 2011

ground control to lieutenant lisleman

Was there a time when you could have used some ground control?

After you have learned something the hard way, don’t you wish you would have just listened to available advice and learned it an easier way?

Like the difference between crash and burn versus touch and go practice.

Just do it. 

Yeah that’s great for Nike. Sure everyone needs to try new things but some activities go better with a little thought and planning. The “Just do it” attitude might just work better in a retirement community than a high school.

The circus is mostly a thing of the past. I don’t know anyone who ran off to join the circus. However, I know a teen or two who ran off to join the homeless. Maybe we need to bring back the circus.

I have an idea for an advice type blog and wiki site. Advice is a tricky thing to give or accept. It’s similar to opinion but includes a suggested action. We are not always receptive to suggestions. However, I know many seek advice at different times. Plenty of books out there filled with it.

As we travel our life road (avenue, street, back alley?) we constantly need to make decisions. We never know if the decision will have a big impact until later. Our society has reached this point because we share the past experience of these decisions.

Of course some decisions have little or no noticeable impact.

(oh my experience tells me the ice cream bar melts quicker than the beer warms, so finish that first)

I don’t have all the details figured out but basically I think a site for parents to share advice would be a useful thing. It would need you to share stories and advice on the site. Are you interested?

Ground Control ==> Take your protein pills and put your helmet on - 


W.C. Camp said...

Advice is great, but unless it can be transcribed into a 100 character text messages, the kids who need it most are unwilling to read it. We can all learn from others mistakes, but sadly most people don't choose to do so as a first resort. W.C.C.

lisleman said...

You are right about people that don't accept it could use it but then the others that did follow it don't need it because they followed it. Of course, some people do have a quality called common sense. You do bring up a good point about text messages. Maybe a twitter account that sends out bits of advice would be helpful. Fortune cookies on twitter.

secret agent woman said...

Nope. Absolutely not for me, either. If I specifically ask someone for advice (an exceedingly rare situation), I will listen. But I loathe unsolicited advice. It's not helpful at best and generally irritates the living hell out of me. And I don't offer advice if I'm not asked because it feels condescending to do so. I am more than capable of figuring out things for myself.

lisleman said...

It is tricky not to come off condescending. Unsolicited advice is not what I had in mind. If it was on a web site readers would be coming to it so I would not consider that unsolicited. I'm going to take a chance and ask - how did you handled advice from a respected family member such as a parent or grandparent?

secret agent woman said...

Same as with anyone else. If I've requested advice, I listen. If I did not, I ignore it or if I'm comfortable with the person I point out that I did not ask for advice. If it's a website, it would be people sharing their opinions - some of it useful some of it useless or even harmful. I'd avoid that, too. There's a lot of supremely bad parenting advice out there.

lisleman said...

Ok thanks for an honest answer. I suspect I would not find many self-help books on your shelves. I don't have them either but I know people buy them. Interesting about avoiding a web site with opinions - maybe in the end people just hear what they want to hear. thanks

Jene said...

"Our society has reached this point because we share the past experience of these decisions."

Yes, and no. Collective knowledge can only take us so far. Sure, there is a lot of useful shared information that keeps us safe, but we also see a lot of history repeating itself. That, and adolescents just aren't meant to take advice from adults (very generally speaking). Sure, they might listen, and every once in a while something might stick, but they're convinced that they are special snowflakes, that the rules aren't the same for them, and that their situations are just SO unique that no adult could possibly understand what they're going through.

I say this as I remember locking myself in my room after my first real heartbreak, playing the same song over and over again, crying, and sneaking out to smoke on the roof. My mom tried to be consoling, but what could she possibly know about it? Never mind the fact that she had warned me about getting too attached to this particular boy, anyway. I couldn't face the fact that she could have possibly been right, because know one knew him the way I did!

I'd like to believe that adults are more receptive to the sharing of wisdom, but I think that might be assuming too much. That said, I still think what you're proposing could be a useful tool.

lisleman said...

thanks for sharing. Comments like yours readjusts my thinking. Some things are known and although we know them, we need to be reminded of them (which itself is known but you and most everyone). Typically I think the attitude of being special as a good thing (self esteem) but you reminded me of the downside of taking special to the point of thinking you have special rules or unique knowledge of the world.
Oh I really like the "special snowflakes" phrase.

Mrs4444 said...

I think the parenting advice website thing has been done (lots), and there are some great ones out there.

"The “Just do it” attitude might just work better in a retirement community than a high school." Loved this one :)

lisleman said...

yes I know (well Ok I can't name one but I'm sure there are plenty) but I wonder if many are the blog type. It's not like I'm a professional (well I was a professional once but not that area) so I think it would be different than most. I would collect posts about life advice with a focus on parenting. It's not going to solve any serious problem but it might help. Support groups help people and those are regular people helping others. I know you have posts that are helpful to parents.

Emily said...

I say if you think you have a good idea, something different from the rest, then as you say, "Just do it!"

lisleman said...

thanks for the support. As I said the details are still being formulated and it not going to happen very soon because I have some other commitments but it will announced on this blog.

Jillsy Girl said...

I think society does tend to take the "Just Do It" route more often than it should. Younger people don't seem to care as much about the consequences of their actions anymore.

Bearmancartoons said...

Bowie popped up in my head in the first line and you completed it in the last. nice

lisleman said...

thank you for your very honest answer. There are many factors that go into advice and the acceptance of it. I wasn't thinking of trust at the time I wrote this but it certainly is very important. Although most know it, being reminded that we need to earn trust is valuable. thanks for sharing some experience and wisdom.

Charlie Callahan said...

I have never had the patience for learning things the easy way. I subscribe, detailed on my blog, to the Peckerhead Method: Jump right in, assemble, and when it doesn't work, look around in the trash for the instruction book.

I wanted to join the circus as a boy, but I just knew if I did that I'd end up following the elephants around with a shovel.

lisleman said...

see Charlie that bit of thinking made you smarter than the elephants. thanks

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