Rub-a-Dub-Dub

Will Mother Goose make it through the social media world of today?
Should those rhymes continue unchanged?

I'm surprised Mick can still jump at all.

Certainly not in a flash.

The world and culture has changed. Jack and Jill's story sounds like a report of child labor and workman’s comp. Besides most everyone has plumbing with running water. Children today could better relate to a Brita filter than fetching water with a bucket.

Peter, that pumpkin eater (have you ever called anyone a pumpkin eater? is that an insult?) would certainly be convicted of spousal abuse in today’s courts.

New parents, don’t be rocking your babies on treetops. The wind will blow and your lawsuit against the cradle maker will be thrown out of court since I’m sure their warning label warns you not to place unattended babies in treetops.

Oh and those dudes in the tub - the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker

• The butcher sold his business and became a vegan.
• The baker lost his apron trying to cash-in on the short lived muffin top craze.
• The candlestick maker was sued after Jack jumped over the candlestick and burned his ass. (see the candlestick inadequate warning label)

Don McLean told us in “American Pie” that:

Jack Flash sat on a candlestick
'Cause fire is the devil's only friend.

Thinking of updates, here’s an updated version of that “American Pie” song.