Thursday, September 08, 2011

pill to swallow

I like simple. Being blunt is good sometimes. I don’t like medicine. Too many of us are over-prescribed. Medicine should not be mass marketed.

According to this Wikipedia article only TWO countries - United States and New Zealand (New Zealand is mostly sheep so that’s ok if they watch) allow drugs to be advertised directly to consumers.

Now that I got that out of the way, let us move on.

I just sat through another dumb big bucks big pharma ad. I could help them shorten it and get the message across quicker.

I present to you my big pharma ad script:

[some soothing relaxed background like a blue sky with a couple of fluffy white clouds - drug name grows bigger on the screen - no music] 


[some great sounding lady voice-over narrates - more people trust a woman’s voice for health advice]

Feeling beat to shit and wondering what truck hit you? 

[a version of the following picture on the screen] 

Vogenitavozy can help you. 

This shit can kill you and possibly make you want to die or become a blogger.

Please talk to your doctor and find out if we could sell you some.

In addition to possible death and increased pain, Vogenitavozy is known to empty the wallets of those that take it.

[return to title screen - end of ad] 

If more big bucks big pharma ads were like the following. It would be a better world.

another circus 


OneStonedCrow said...

Hahaha ... indeed!

I still can't figure out if Vogenitavozy is a laxative or something like Viagra ...

lisleman said...

wow a non-US reader is the first to comment.  I assume you don't get bombarded by these stupid ads over there.  Hey want to buy some Vogenitavozy?  I just made up the name.  Maybe I should trademark it.  It's made from pure snake oil.

frau said...

Those commercials always crack me up....with most of those warnings why would anyone take the drug. Love the cartoon video too funny!

Bearmancartoons said...

How many countries are based on socialized medicine so it really wouldn't matter too much?

lisleman said...

thanks - they are sorta funny but after seeing too many I mostly get annoyed.  Maybe a drug could be created to remove the annoyance of drug ads.

lisleman said...

interesting point.  From the little I know about Canada I think many Canadians opt to take some treatment with their own money (loonies - we should change the name dollar).  But following your idea, why does big pharma bother with all the drugs targeted to seniors who have medicare in this country?

W.C. Camp said...

Hey don't knock all those fancy pills - I am getting to the age where I am going to need 'em to keep me alive a little longer so I say get COZY with VOGENITAVOZY! W.C.C.

lisleman said...

As I mentioned in an earlier reply, I just made up the name.  You could write the next ad for it if you like.  Cozy with Vogenitavozy - catchy - as catchy as the additional illnesses likely to be contracted by taking it.

Antares said...

Side effects: May cause everything you are trying to avoid.

lisleman said...

Ha - that sums it up very well.  thanks

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