across the sea of years

They played their first show as Led Zeppelin on 25 October, 1968. Now, 50 years after forming their rock band we should update their song titles. Also, a few song lyrics could use a parody type change. The music should be still played with the same guitar riffs since it will help our recall and many can’t hear too well anymore.

Led Zeppelin brought the house down playing in Chicago

Led Zeppelin hooked me with their first album. Fond memories of listening to their aggressive (at that time) hard rock with my friends in my friend's basement. He lived in a large ranch style house with a full basement. Our small neighborhood gang took over a storage room down there and added a black light or two.  

Their second album was must have for me too. By fall of 1970 our gang of rockstar wanna-bees had given up on our basement room and moved on to hanging out in our cars. Their third album, fall of '70, went mostly unnoticed by us. This explains why I had not heard of the song, "Out on the Tiles" that I mention below.

I suggest the following title changes:

Escalator to Heaven (much easier on the knees and hips than a stairway)
Stumble On
When the Bladder Breaks
Over the Hill (shorten version of Over the Hills and Far Away)

I’m surprised to find more song titles that don’t need word changes. Now the meanings of words or phrases has changed given our senior context. The following titles need not change but the lyrics often don't apply:

Heartbreaker - A leading cause of death for those over 65.
Communication Breakdown - Why the failed communication with seniors? Hearing loss? Memory loss? Or maybe we have perfected our selective hearing over the years.
What Is And What Should Never Be - why do our bodies wear down like a creaky house?
Dazed and Confused - don’t ask I don't remember.
Bathroom Sound - Discovered this one while preparing this post. It was originally titled “Out on the Tiles” re-released without the lyrics as “Bathroom Sound”. New bathroom sounds with age
Sick Again - I've lost that youthful resilience?

There are others but you get the idea. “Kashmir” has been described as the most progressive and original track that Led Zeppelin ever recorded. I find the following lines describe one's life journey very poetically.

Oh, pilot of the storm who leaves no trace, like thoughts inside a dream
Heed the path that led me to that place, yellow desert stream
My Shangri-La beneath the summer moon, I will return again
Sure as the dust that floats high in June, when movin' through Kashmir.
Oh, father of the four winds, fill my sails, across the sea of years
With no provision but an open face, along the straits of fear Ohh.