Monday, May 13, 2013

Lisleman breaks less news



Hey it’s better than breaking wind.

News or opinion, news or speculation, do we bother to discern the difference?

Here at the Lisleman news desk (ok it’s more like an old TV tray) you can depend on the news being biased and aged with a sprinkle of speculation.  Also don't count on it being very new.  Consider it more like breaking news history.


I find this first story ripe for speculation. Now if you are like me, many news stories just tickle those speculative neurons. Do any of the following thoughts orbit the circle of your mind while hearing/reading a news story?

What were they thinking?
Those people are idiots.
I wouldn’t fall for that.
That person must be unstable.
Where are my keys? (they are always lost)

Summary of a parking tickets gone wild. 
  • Woman - owner of car 
  • Ex-boyfriend - appears to be a sweet talking con man 
  • O’Hare Airport - busy place 
  • United Airlines - apparently has plenty of space in its employee parking lots  

Guy gets this junk car ($600 sale price) but car is titled in girlfriend’s name. No explanation given for the title arrangement. Please offer your speculation in the comment section. Sweet talking man works for United Airlines at O’Hare airport. He lost the keys once and got the remaining set from her. Apparently after getting the last set of keys the relationship and the car broke down. The car sat in the spacious employee parking lot and accumulated $105,000 in parking fines (that hot new Tesla sport car goes for less ) from November 2009 to October 2012. Woman with biggest loser ex-boyfriend didn’t have access to parking lot. I speculate the woman also doesn’t open her mail from the city because the story mentions she had racked-up $2000 on another car (probably different boyfriend).

Woman told reporters, “I could not get into that lot to move the car. He had the car keys; he had everything." Yes everything, like women who loan him cars to abandon. Hopefully she got a better boyfriend from this experience. (Chicago Tribune story)


unrelated "Hard to Get" item at an airport


Another possibly related story from O’Hare airport: O’Hare airports gets goats.

Having found room for a goat pen on previous United Airlines employee parking space a herd of goats will now provide ecological sound field maintenance.  Program will provide new jobs for about 25 goats. (Chicago Tribune story)

8 comments:

Joanne said...

There's not much to say about the long term parking plan. The goats, however....The man who owns a garage up the road keeps goats behind a privacy fence behind the garage. And lambs and chickens. They all get loose from time to time and wander mostly onto the road, where they stop 45 mph traffic. The local police swear if they get one more call they WILL look up the county ordinance that will let them cite him for a nuisance.

lisleman said...

they have a plan to keep the goats off the runway. It's a plan. thanks

Cheryl P. said...

I heard about the lady with the huge parking fine. I would think there should be a reasonable top number as far as fines go but.... Chicago tried to settle with her for around $4,460 but she refused because the ex-wouldn't pay his share. Even that is a lot of money for a $600 car. What a mess.


As a native Illini, I can only imagine the goats is a last ditch effort because Illinois has run through their budget. Goats must be cheaper to employ than people. This can only lead to problems. Do they not get that there will be veterinarians, animal care, feed, etc. involved??? I think it's a really bbaaa-d idea.

lisleman said...

I believe they will save money with the goats. I understand the area where the goats will graze is rough and difficult to mow. I just hope they make sure the goats can't wander over to a runway.
The parking ticket mess is crazy. I don't understand why the company, United Airlines, would not have the car towed.

tracismixedbag said...

I'm so happy there are more jobs opening up for goats these days. Proof, the economy is recovering. LOL

lisleman said...

Yes it's good news because unemployed goats act like, .. well old mean goats. thanks

Bearman Cartoons said...

That's baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad haha

lisleman said...

Maybe not for the goats. thanks

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